Make your own free website on

Save Our Selves
Part of the World Wide SOS Family


Over View

What is SOS

Organization from Europe

Sobriety Priority

James Christopher

Your Sobriety Toolkit

Europe Tool box

First 30  Days

Europe First
30 Days

SOS Dallas Guide to Starting a Meeting

SOS Behind Bars Guide  to  Starting a Meeting

Europe How to Start a Meeting

SOS Dallas Opening  Meeting

Relapse  Prevention

An SOS Approach to eating Disorders

Guide Book for Group Leaders

Behind Bars Posts

Family & Friends

SOS Conference 2000

SOS -AA From SOS Europe

SOS-AA as One Member Sees it

Discussion__ on 12 Steps

Why 12 Steps Work for Some People

Could Your Group be a Cult?

Chartered or Shackled

Scientific & Medical Articles

Limbic Lizard


Cyber Chips

SOS Links

SOS Links Print Out

Other Links


Real Time Chat


We are posting letters from members who want to share what is
happening in their SOS Meetings, or their feelings about SOS.

Write to:
SOS Behind Bars
4773 Hollywood Blvd
Hollywood, CA 90027

Phone # 323-666-4295

We will try to post all the letters that you send.  If you have a Private Message.  Please Write Private Not For Posting.  Most people don't want to use their full name.  State how  you want your post signed.

Hi my name is Terrance:   
            I am a sober
addict.  I'm presently incarcerated at the Hutchins State Jail Unit here in
Dallas, TX.  My arrest & incarceration was a direct result of my addiction.  While attending a substance abuse program provided by the Hutchins Unit, I was for the first time informed about SOS, Save Our Selves.  I was interested in the Sobriety Priority concept separating religion, or spirituality & all other issues, from sobriety.  Making getting & staying sober the focal point of the program.  Being that my religious beliefs do not exactly coincide with the traditional Spiritual 12 Step Program.  I wanted to learn more about SOS.  I attended my first Sobriety Meeting & was overwhelmed by the support & encouragement I received from group members for my efforts in accepting & taking control of the changes & the reconstruction of my own life & recovery.  It is my choice & my decision alone to remain sober, or abstain from Alcohol/Drugs & all other mind-altering chemicals.  By keeping & maintain a sober state of mind & body I can efficiently & effectively control my decision making process, use rational thinking, & sound judgment in making decisions that could very well effect my very existence here on earth, along with the quality of life that could be lived. Although I am aware & do realize, in this life, I can't change the inevitable.  There are, and will be many situations, or circumstances that I have no control over.  What I do control is my decision to experience with a positive attitude, a sober state of mind & body.  The operating functions, of the faculties that aid, and assist my in copping & dealing with life's uncertainties, are now in a natural & pure state of mind & body.  Free from the influence of Alcohol/Drugs or mind altering chemicals.  

     So in essence, this alliterative lifestyle that I've chosen to live, abstinent from Alcohol/Drugs is to my benefit & the betterment of my life.  Not only do I reap the rewards, my family, friends, community,& the entire world in which I live will benefit from my success in staying sober.  

       SOS, Save Our Selves, gives me the opportunity to openly express the methods and strategies that I believe will work for me.  I take responsibility for my program of recovery.  Believing that Self or Self-Empowerment is the motivating force that rules SOS & it's members.  

      SOS is not against or in competition with 12 Step Programs.  SOS respects recovery in any form regardless of the path by with it is achieved.  The 12 Step Program of AA, NA, CA, etc,... have aided thousands upon thousands get & remain sober.  Yet there are thousands upon thousands like my-self who participated in 12-Step Programs & did not benefit or remain sober from our participation.  It's not that the 12 Step Program is or was a failure, it just didn't provide me with the results that were beneficial to me.  Eighty-five percent of the population in the State of Texas Jails & Prisons are incarcerated due to some kind of addiction, be it to Alcohol/Drugs, Sex. Gambling, etc,....

      The 12 Step Program is not the solution for every one.  That's a Fact.  SOS, Save Our Selves offers an Alternative Method to get & remain sober.  It's been proven to work for thousands of people, SOS does not claim to be The Way  It's A Way  A Choice that works for me,& other like minded people.  One day at a time.      
Thank you for your time.  

Mr. Duaine

Please find enclosed a letter with a few words explaining how I feel at this time concerning my sobriety recovery program. You did advise me that you may place some or my entire letter on the Internet so others may benefit by reading. Feel free to use any or all as you see fit. In addition, I drew the picture on the envelope just for you. The picture depicts SOS with a little more expansion in mind, exactly as I would like to see SOS succeed behind bars.

We missed you at the SOS meeting on Monday. Two regulars and myself showed up, three newcomers attended the meeting. The meeting had an air of inspiration to it; everyone agreed the meeting was enjoyable and all would return. I know I for one enjoyed the meeting. I'm a newcomer myself but I learn more and more about myself and why I do what I do the more I discuss my recovery, etc. etc.

You know I sometimes think about you and wonder why you help others as you do, knowing well you receive no pay. I sometimes feel I could benefit or experience the feeling of life-fulfillment by helping others to help themselves. The more I become involved in sobriety programs, the more positive thinking charges me and everyone I come in contact with. Overall I can begin to enjoy life the more I think about it.

I not only missed seeing you at the meeting but I am also concerned for your health. I don't like thinking you may not be well, Anyhow, Duaine, we are looking to seeing you at our next meeting if you are able, we really do need your help.

I appreciate what you are doing, Duaine. Keep up the good work. I wish you all the best life has to offer. See you soon.



My name is Richard. 

I'm a newcomer to this SOS Sobriety stuff. I've always knew that I am a problem drinker but I've also pretended or tried to fool myself to believe that I can manage or control my drinking. I've always thought of myself as being smart enough and talented enough to amount to be "some body" someday but the problem there is that in 25 years of touch-and-go drunkenness, I never stayed sober long enough to have given myself enough opportunity or chance to actually "become somebody" instead of being the career drunk that I have become.

I've been sober long enough now to consider becoming responsible for my actions and to place more scrutiny on my pattern of thinking. At one point I thought my problems were in money matters, so as I setout to solve this, I ended up with enough money to drink my way to hell and back. I then thought that maybe the problem was with my relations with women. It turned out no matter how good life treated me; I had to be drunk to be happy.

Finally, I have considered that, if I have to be drunk to feel happy, then my concept of happiness must be wrong. I have concluded that I have the tendency to look at life in a somewhat dreary or negative way. At times, I tend to have doubts on my talent or capabilities and so I tend to procrastinate on matters more than to place more emphasis on my value or self-worth. It would appear I have conditioned my pattern of thinking over the years, which results in my own self-destruction. My state of reality is distorted. I have concluded my problem is a lack of self-esteem. The more I begin to examine my value, self-worth and look on life and people around me in a more positive way, the happier I feel inside. I have learned that, although it's OK to examine negative effects, it is not OK that I lose sight of my value and self-worth. Sort of like being prepared for the worst but never losing sight of hoping for the best.

During my self-examination I have begun to realize a vast array of new alternatives and choices available to me in my brand new process of practicing positive thinking, through Positive Thinking, the more good I see in myself results in my feeling happier about life going on around me. There will always be bad days along with the good but my learning to handle concerns around me thinking in a more positive way, may result in a happier life and smile on my face. The more good I see in me, the happier I feel; exactly that the doctor ordered.

Realizing a lacking in self-esteem has been my problem is sort of the bottom-line here and realizing also that I am desperate to be in the influence of positive minds,- that's where SOS comes in. I feel SOS is respectful of my right to see religious matters in my own way. Besides, I was religious the whole time that I lost sight of my self-esteem, so religion was not my problem. I appreciate the relaxed informal atmosphere in SOS Meetings, where I may feel comfortable and at ease to discuss whatever comes to mind regarding my recovery and to encourage others to continue their recovery as well. For me to fellowship with others about sobriety and what life has to offer with positive thinking results in getting me supercharged for success.

I've learned enough in my experience to have the desire not to continue to wallow in failure. To improve my self-esteem will require that I become just a little bit on the selfish side when it comes to considering my value and self-worth but I'm happy it. Having the desire to want to change for better and to practice positive thinking is the beginning of my recovery. This is my story and sticking to it! Thanks for reading.

Sincerely - Richard

Hello Duaine and to everyone who reads this. 
I wish you a bright and happy day.

Many subjects come to mind when I ponder the question of recover: outside recourses, attitude, positive thinking, self-respect, responsibility, discipline, consistency, obedience, etc., etc. Having an addictive character means to me that I have developed a negative pattern of thinking which results in my failure. For some people the addictive character may go beyond the point of thinking, but for me it was the thinking part, which always landed me behind bars. Being either unhappy of dissatisfied is a situation, not a problem. It is the method or solution being used to handle my situation where I begin to encounter problems, not the situation itself. The methods used to solve a situation require my thinking to do so, so common sense indicates to me that my analytical thinking is the problem in my addictive character. In fact, my thinking is my character! My logical, rational thinking is either positive or negative, and I am convinced negative thinking is a destructive, invisible monster in my mind.

My way to recovery or to combat this addictive character is to reverse this negative/positive thinking. Since negative thinking is so-o-o well established in my character, over numerous years of practice, it will take much time to rethink my way to recovery.

At one point in this SOS Sobriety Program, I once thought my problem stemmed from something missing or some void in my life. But I have finally come to believe that the only thing missing was sobriety. In past times, I had only accomplished adding a sedative in my life, not filling any voids, because none exist. Everything which exist in a sober state of mind is all that is necessary to accomplish whatever I set my mind to accomplish, there is nothing missing. I need only to be disciplined, responsible and be held accountable for my actions, so I may accomplish whatever I choose to do. My actions are based upon choice. I have the freedom to choose between right and wrong, between success and failure.

A lacking of self-respect had a very negative effect on my sense of honesty and values. My self-worth turned to selfishness. Negativity became my character. It took negative thinking to develop a negative character and a negative character became my doom. My analytical thinking mind is either positive or negative; thinking positive has never developed problems in my life. Negativity has a very selfish aspect to it, in that; I tend to take the easy out in dealing with life's disappointments or sticky situations. Having an addictive character means that I have a problem with being able to accept living life on life's terms.

I must learn to use caution where I may have a tendency to demand control in matters, which are beyond my power to control. Subjects of control are where a negative selfishness sneaks into my mind. A selfish control mechanism usually results in my setting myself up to feel things like impatience, disappointment, anger, frustration and hate the very worst of feelings to make life miserable. Accepting life on life's term's means to me that I must set aside and refrain from selfish thoughts and desires to control. The subject of selfishness has many topics; selfish-control is only one of them. I must beware daily in matters of control to ensure my intentions are not dishonest or selfish. Mostly, I must learn to accept situations I have no power to control.

I have deduced the core of my negative character down to the point on the subject of thinking. A negative thought will result in a negative feeling and I turn a negative feeling will result in a negative action. Think, feel and action. It all seems so very simple and yet when selfishness and dishonesty sets in simple things become very complicated. The more I scrutinize my thinking, the more character traits I come to identify and recognize. The more I think on positive sober subjects, the more I desire to commit to positive choices and alternatives. I don't have to live in misery if I choose not to live this way. I certainly won't find happiness on the negative side of the road, so maybe I need driving lessons.

Now after being humiliated and realizing my mistakes, I cannot turn back the hands of time and change the damage, which has been done. Humility in it all is good in the way it lets me know I possess a wanting inside to be a better person. I won't bother to wallow in the regrets; the decision to change is all the constrictive repair possible on that subject. I commit myself to honesty in all matters, positive thinking and improving self-esteem.

The situations I encounter daily in prison do not require drugs or alcohol to result in trouble but it does require positive thinking and a good attitude to get along with others around me. To scrutinize and rethink my best thinking keeps me busy nowadays and the more practiced I become, the easier it gets to catch my thoughts in action. The actual and true state of reality is not always nice or pretty or easy to handle but as long as I remain sober, I am ready to meet the challenge of life in a positive way. Sobriety is my priority. The more I learn, the more life begins to have fulfillment and meaning for me. Actually I am beginning to enjoy the challenges of sober-reality and what it has to offer when used constructively.

Thanks for reading this. Take care and good luck in everything you do.




Dear Sir:

I was given this address by someone who goes to the same SOS Meeting that I go to.

Now with due respect I must say that I don't know the exact purpose of your address but I do know that y'all publish SOS material on the net and well I want to thank y'all for your work because I feel that SOS is very important to people like me.

So Thanks!

And please let everyone know that we in Ramsey 1 Unit have a SOS weekly meeting. It's a very good group and I also want to thank everyone in the meeting because they are being very helpful in my recovery.

I admit that I'm young in my recovery and would welcome all help, advice or suggestions as to how to overcome these drinking thoughts that I have…

Anyway thanks everyone and keep up the good work.

I'm out - take Care & Keep Recovery in Mind.

G. E.

Write To:
SOS Behind Bars

4773 Hollywood Blvd
Hollywood, CA 90027

Phone # 323-666-4295

Thank you at SOS Behind Bars for this web page.  To see all of this web site go to

Duaine Metevia

Save Our Selves (SOS)
4773 Hollywood Blvd
Hollywood, CA 90027
Phone# 323-666-4295

Find a Meeting
If you want to become a part of SOS let James Christopher know you're out there.  If there is no meeting listed in your area, it could mean that there are people in your area who are waiting for more people to come forward and start a meeting.  The way meetings start are people contacting the clearing house and leaving their contact info.  Some cities only have phone contacts, people who will talk to you or meet with you for coffee so please leave your contact info; don't miss out.

The content of this web site is for your information only concerning the ideas and methods of self help groups. 
We do not accept any responsibility for their accuracy or use.
You agree to hold harmless the SOS organizations and webmaster from any and all 
liability arising directly or indirectly from your use of information contained in this web site. 
The use of any information is entirely the responsibility of the reader.
The same applies to all sites connected by links from this site. The webmaster does not accept responsibility for 
the content, operation or use of information on linked sites. 
Links to other sites do not mean approval, agreement or affiliation with those sites or their sponsors.